Downhill toward Disaster

 

07/10/90

Published in the Ensign September 1999

I had been working the last five weeks for my brother-in-law Teryl (what a great guy) who had just purchased a share in a logging company. We were logging up the Monte Cristo canyon just east of Ogden UT on the Wyoming border. I would help him on my days off from the Lincoln County Sheriff’s Office in Kemmerer WY.  This particular morning as I woke up early to go, my wife was even more persistent this morning that I not go.  She had an uneasy feeling and was worried about me. It just didn’t feel right she said. Later she had told me that after I had left she even prayed that I would get into a wreck or have car troubles, anything to prevent me from getting to the logging camp. I thought it was just because she was pregnant with our second son Shane and it was the first weekend she wasn’t going to come with me and spend the weekend at the logging camp.  Little did I know it was promptings to keep me safe. 

The long early, just before the crack of dawn drive up the canyon was beautiful but uneventful. I always love the world in the morning before everyone else gets up and moving. As soon as I got up to the logging camp I knew it was going to be a bad day.  When I got to the logging camp and opened my camper, I found that a raccoon had broken in and had eaten all my Cap’n Crunch and my Oreos. That was breakfast lunch and dinner all gone.  The work day started out as usual but went downhill fast.  Our equipment was old and we seemed to be plagued with small inconveniences and break downs.

Before I continue I need to explain how this logging operation works.  We were doing what’s called ‘highline logging’.  This is done when the mountain is too steep for any kind of equipment to go up or down.  The way we logged on this steep terrain was to string a heavy ¾ cable from a derrick on top of the mountain to a ‘spar’ tree (just a really big tree) in the bottom of the valley.  The main cable hangs 20 to 50 feet over the surface of the steep hill.  A second cable rides down the main line on a block with a series of pullies.  When the block hits what’s called a button or donut it stops and releases the second cable sending it down to the ground.  The 2^nd cable is then hooked to 3 or 4 logs.  The logs are then pulled or flown up to the “deck”, a level area where the equipment can work.  We can only get so many logs in one area on the hill until the button must be moved down the cable.  The button is essentially a large steel piece that weighed about 60lbs it locks on the main cable and prevents the block from going further down the cable.

Now back to the story.  As I said, we had had many breakdowns. One, of which, was our radios that we used to communicate to the guy running the cables, so we were using hand signals to communicate which was slow and inadequate at best.  This day I worked down in the brush hooking up the trees on the steep mountain side. We had cleaned up all the logs in that area and it was time for us to move the button to a new area full of lumber. We signaled for the main cable to be lowered and the main cable with the button was brought down within my reach, but still over my head. Usually I would have it lowered to the ground so it could be handed better and kept under control. But because of the difficulty communicating I decided to go ahead and unlock the button anyway. I walked the button downhill until I was standing on a very steep embankment that dropped off making it almost like a cliff. The weight of the button tried pulling me down the hill.  It took all my strength and body weight but I was able to keep it under control. I had my heals dug in to the soft mountain soil and I was leaning back into the mountain to prevent it from running away with me. I tried to tell them to lower the cable more but about that time the wind gusted causing the main line to whip, it was like a wave that picked me up and carried me off my feet and down the very steep hill faster and faster like some kind of out of control adrenalin filled high adventure zip line.

I was now heading down towards the spar tree at a break neck speed.  I looked for a place to jump off but I was already high in the air and all I could see were piles of limbs laying kriss-kross and sticking straight up. As I was flying by it looked as if all of the limbs had been sharpened to a point. I could just imagine one of them going right through my gut if I tried to jump off. Not knowing, or really thinking of what lay ahead I decided not to jump for fear of being gored. Anyway so far the ride was kinda fun, I remember chuckling to myself about this predicament had gotten myself into, kind of rolling my eyes thinking, well how are you going to get yourself out of this one? At the very beginning of this ride I even had to lift my feet to avoid some limbs, “WHY DIDN’T I LET GO THEN” I thought. Now I had a bird’s eye view of the whole canyon and I was blissfully unaware of how fast I was going or how this ride was about to end. When I looked up I saw that I was racing toward the spar tree.  I was about 50 feet off the ground and moving fast, the witnesses said about thirty to thirty-five miles an hour.  I did not have any time to think.

The spar tree was about eight feet in diameter at the bottom and about 3 feet in diameter where the cable was hooked to it. There was one large limb sticking out at one side that caught my attention.  I thought that maybe if I swung out to the side of the tree just before impact and wrapped myself around this limb it would save me from falling. I centrally didn’t want to just ride it to a head-on with the tree. I let go of the chain that was hooked to the button with one hand and prepared to hit/catch/wrap myself around the limb.  When I hit the first thing I saw was my feet, I hit so hard it caused a bruise across my chest, popped my ribs out of socket where they attach to my back and a bruised my heart, it also dislocated my arm my momentum flipped me upside down, wrapping me completely around the limb.  Then everything went black.  There were flashes of consciousness as I tumbled down the tree ping ponging through the limbs. I remember seeing my heard hat sailing like a Frisbee or a space ship across the canyon. I also remember hitting different limbs as I fell. I hit the ground sitting up with my legs straight out then bounced one last time about 60ft down the hill finally going unconscious. When I awoke I was laying face down in the dirt on my stomach unable to breath, with a mouth full of dirt. For a minute I couldn’t remember who I was or what had happened.  I heard a faint voice asking me if I was all right.  I felt like I could not breathe, so I asked to be rolled over.  The pain was so great that I blacked out again.

When I came to I was laying on my back in the middle of an old logging road about 20 feet from the tree.  I had no feeling from my hips down, cuts all over and was still having trouble breathing.  I said a simple prayer and asked the Lord to help me.  I opened my eyes and there was Ethan Call.  It was his first day with the logging crew.  I remembered my wife telling me that he had served a mission.  Up to that day I was the only priesthood holder on the crew. Relieved and realized Father had heard my prayer. I asked him to give me a blessing.

As he began, immediately a sense of calm came over Teryl, Ethan and me.  I had been unconscious for most of the blessing, but I did hear him bless me that my body would be made whole.  As I laid there I began to feel again the sensation in my legs and the pain became bearable.  The Holy Ghost bore witness to us that God had performed a miracle and we were each left with a testimony of what had just happened.

It became apparent that it was going to be a long time before medical help arrived.  Teryl told me that Rick Earling had already started down the mountain to get help.  I knew it was a two hour drive out of the canyon to the nearest phone.  I closed my eyes and said another simple prayer and asked for the Lords help again to speed up the help I so desperately needed.  My prayer was again answered in a miraculous way.  As Rick was speeding down the canyon he happened to run across a paramedic who was out for an afternoon drive. (this was a Thursday at 10:00am) The paramedic had a high power radio that he was able to reach across the mountains to the Weber County Sheriff’s Department.  They in turn were able to call McKay Dee Hospital and get Life Flight on its way.   The paramedic then rushed up the mountain to where I was laying, he started an IV and stopped all my bleeding.  God had again answered my prayer.  I was able to get the medical help and the transportation I needed within a fraction of the time we were expecting.

The helicopter was now circling overhead but after a few passes they radioed down that the only place they could land was a flat spot about half a mile up this old logging road.  When I heard this my blood chilled!  I looked to my side to see an old jacked-up Ford 4x4 on the heavily rutted road. The thought of a ride in the back of a four wheel drive truck over a rutted, dirt road was more than I could bear.  I again simply asked the Lord for help.

The helicopter circled one last time and radioed down they had decided to try to land closer.  They were able to land within 50 feet of where I was laying by balancing the helicopter with the tips of their runners on the road and the back half of the chopper hovering off the road.  Within 15 minutes I arrived at McKay Dee Hospital’s emergency room.  They started another IV, put a tube down my nose into my stomach and also started me on oxygen.  They pumped blood out of my stomach for three hours. 

I had four doctors and two specialist working on me for six hours.  They X-rayed me from the top of my head to my knees and were unable to find any broken bones.  This baffled all of them.  They stated many times that there was no possible way a body could have received that many blows, as I was flipped from branch to branch as I fell down the tree without having some broken bones or internal injuries.  I was given a cat-scan from my neck to my knees – scanned a half of an inch at a time.  This took about one hour.  Baffled again because they found nothing.  They were not even able to find out what had caused the bleeding in my stomach.

My brother Bryan was the first one to get to the emergency room and was there when they got me settled into a room in intensive care.

The doctors told me I had caused enough trauma to my body that I wouldn’t walk for a couple of weeks.  That night I asked Bryan to give me a blessing.  He did and then left.  On his way home he was unable to ignore the promptings to gather up another elder and return to give me an anointed blessing.  During the blessing the Holy Ghost again bore witness to me that I would be all right. I was filled with the confidence that I would be able to walk the next day…which I did!

I am thankful for the blessings I was given by those men who honored their priesthood.  I am also thankful for the continuous prayers in the hearts of those who are close to me.  I am thankful for miracles.  I know that God lives and answer prayers…no matter how simple they are.

 

 

10? Things I want my kids to know (Part 2)

4.       It’s ok to cry; I have told you time and time again to suck it up and move forward, often accompanied by a “cuff-up-side the head”. Endlessly I chastised you for crying when you were younger, as I told you to just rub some dirt on it and get moving. I fear that in an effort to help you be aware that you are tougher than you know. I may have put a negative spin on all crying. I would like to rectify that now! It is ok to cry. We must not waste time feeling sorry for ourselves; however it is appropriate to morn when we have experienced loss. Not only is it appropriate but it is essential to being able to deal with and understand what has happened and eventually put it into perspective and move forward. It can be a great stress reliever. It is ok and even necessary to see hurt and pain for what it is and deal with it, not bottle it up or we will pay a much higher price when that bottled up emotion finally overflows and overwhelms us.

My least favorite time to cry is when I have transgressed. I know, and we have been promised that with transgression there will always be tears.

There are other times we might cry, when we are extremely happy, like good memories of my family or when we are moved and overwhelmed by the spirit. These times are my favorite times to cry. I love tears of happiness and joy or the way in which the spirit overwhelms me and brings me to tears. (*Side note; don’t mistake crying for always feeling the spirit as I sometimes have. Sometimes it’s just us crying?)

How do I know it’s ok to cry?

The toughest men and women I have come to know have cried. I remember as a boy when dad cut off the tips of his toes with the lawn mower. He limped into the house with a shredded bloody shoe and through pursed lips told Bryan and me to leave. We ran out the old wooden screen door then turned around and pressed our noses back to the screen to watch and see what would happen. He called for mom and as she began to look him over. He griped the chair in obvious agony and grunted through clinched teeth “I thought you were supposed to faint if the pain got this bad”.  Not one tear was shed then or when he broke his wrist and it was left just dangling crooked when the tractor backfired while he was crank starting it, or when the horse kicked him in the head giving him a concussion. The first time in my life I can remember my dad crying was at his mother’s furfural. If he had ever shed a tear before that I can’t say that I remember. But there in the sorrow of saying goodbye, his heart broken at this new loss, the toughest and bravest man I knew wept. What a tribute to his wonderful mother. Earl Crockett senior, at the loss of his young son Kelly. Gordon B Hinckley as he spoke of his beloved wife.

See also; John 11:35. 3 Nephi 17;21,22

 

5.       Stay close to the lord and pray always. All my happiness and joy I can trace back to my efforts to be obedience to the  gospel and the knowledge it has given me. Sadness always follows when I have strayed. Stay close and life will be better. I remember one night out coon hunting with Kyli. She was only about 10 at the time and loved to hunt the dogs. We had just recently got a new cell phone with a 2 year contract. She had asked if she could hold the phone and I let her. At the end of the night hunting we had followed those dogs all over that valley in the dark and had a very successful night. When we got the dogs loaded up in the truck and headed back for home around midnight. I asked her for the phone. I saw the panicked look come over her face as she felt her empty pockets.

 “I must have dropped it somewhere along the way.” she said in a panic. We had walked miles in tall sage brush, grass and weeds following our hounds. There was no way to find it in the dark with such a large area to cover and even if we went back we could not retrace our tracks kuz the dogs and coons didn’t know how to follow a trail or even go in a straight line. After thinking about it for a second, realizing we couldn’t possibly retrace our steps, afford a new phone or even get out of the contract I said “will you say a prayer and ask Heavenly Father to help us find the phone?” (You see, I happen to know and bare my personal testimony that Father Loves to listen to children.)So on cue she said a very simple prayer, her little head bowed, and little arms folded. As she offered that small childlike simple prayer the earth seemed to quiet a little, the restless dogs, still wound up from the hunt settled down and the cool midnight breeze was exactly right. The air seemed crisp; not cool just crisp all as if to indicate that Father was paying attention to this prayer.  It was the silver blue moon that offered our only light and it was enough to get you around. We pulled back into the spot we had unloaded hours earlier. I turned to her and asked if she thought we would find it. She shrugged her shoulders not knowing how we possibly could.

 I had felt like this would be one of those times that Father would reach out his hand and perform a wonder for this little girl’s prayer. I silently asked that He might grant her this prayer as a way of showing her His love. We got out of the truck with the plan that we would just try to follow the path as best we could of the earlier hunt. I looked out at the dark landscape and the seemingly impossible task but, I felt peace. As I stepped toward to the first fence crossing that we had crawled through, I saw a blinking green light in the tall grass. It was the phone!!! We snatched it up with lightened hearts and started home after having a prayer of thanks. I guess the point of this story is to reaffirm to you that He hears and answers you prayers. If it’s important to you it’s important to Him. I have similar stories for all of my children.

  2 Nephi 4:35 Yea, I know that God will give ^aliberally to him that asketh. Yea, my God will give me, if I ^bask ^cnot amiss; therefore I will lift up my voice unto thee; yea, I will cry unto thee, my God, the ^drock of my ^erighteousness. Behold, my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God. Amen.

 

6.       Always be thankful. There is always, always, always, something to be grateful for. Some people go through life looking for the silver lining on every cloud and others will look for the cloud on every silver lining. In life you will always find what you’re looking for. I cannot say that enough, you will always find what you’re looking for!! So look for the good. Search out those things that are praiseworthy, uplifting and desirable.

Happiness is what you find when you’re engaged in being thankful; it’s not a thing you get, or something you buy, or a place you go, or a time you wait for. If you can’t be grateful and happy for what is in your life right now, with where you are and what you have, chances are you won’t be happy when you get what you though you wanted or where you thought happiness is waiting.

In our life we will face grief, pain, suffering and disappointment that are real and are meant to be part of our earthly experience. These times are hard and will be uncomfortable and sometimes seem overwhelming. We can still make them better or worse depending on how we stand and face them. I’m not advocating pretending that all is well, as the house around you burns down, but “Attitude is everything” this is an eternal principle.

When life gets going too fast, stop and remember all that you have to be thankful for.
(Count your blessings) If you haven’t made this a habit then at first it will be hard. Ask for help from Father to see and recognize your blessings. They are there I promise.

When we are thankful, little things and stumbling blocks seem to get out of our way. There is less in our life that weighs us down, less to fear and less to cause worry. We are freer to see and enjoy all the things around us. Gratitude will help improve every aspect of your life; physical, financial, relational, mental, emotional and spiritual. Unfortunately the opposite is also true. A bad attitude is the destroyer of every good thing.

One thing that is yours and can never be taken away is your attitude. You must see, understand and own this. If you have a bad attitude then you and you alone chose that. You are always in control of that. It is the great lie that something, or what someone else did is in control of your attitude. Don’t get caught in the trap of this great lie.

If you have a min watch this:

 

If not you Than who???

I’ve heard it said that just outside our comfort zone is the Lords work zone.  

I was out shopping this weekend with my wonderful wife when down one of the many aisles I saw a beautiful young mother to be who was very, very heavy with child. Her countenance glowed and the smile on her face told me she was a happy person. I said to myself “bless her heart “ and thought for a moment how we all could be a little more thankful for the woman that have brought us into this world and their sacrifices in giving us life.

Later after we had checked out and my wife had gone to get one last thing I waited alone at the exit and I again saw her and this time with her family, she was there with her husband and their young child. All were smiling and having a good time. They seemed picture perfect. They were young and were just at the beginning of this adventure of life.  It seemed that they were happy and well adjusted. It brought me joy to see the sincere expressions of happiness in their lives.

Then I reflecting in that split second on my life, and the ugliness and heart break of divorce I said a quick prayer that they might remain a happy family. As I prayed I thought of the importance of the gospel in our life's and how it helps us all be better people, to try harder and treat each other with love and respect and how if they had that in their life it may give them better chances to resist the world as it tries to rip them apart, and remain a happy family. So I added in my prayer “Please father bless them that they might come to the knowledge of the gospel  and the happiness it would bring to their life's.” as I prayed the words came into my mind “share the gospel with them” they had already passed me and were out in the parking lot headed for their car. I can’t (I said back confidently in my thoughts, brushing it off) I don’t know how.? What would I say? What if they thought I was a stocker, freak or weirdo? (now pleading)Haven’t I prayed for them? Isn’t that my part?  Will you please send someone to tell them? They need this gospel!!! The thought came again “Go now, you can still catch them.” In my heart I felt heavy, now my eyes started to fill with tears as I fought the paralyzing fear that held me in place. Softly and sheepishly I thought “I can’t….” As I watched them step into the darkness of that Saturday evening the next thought filled my mind and echoing in my soul and was left to haunt me, was “If not you then who?"

1 Nephi 8;12 And as I partook of the fruit thereof it filled my soul with exceedingly great joy; wherefore, I began to be desirous that my family should partake of it also; for I knew that it was desirable above all other fruit.